I often find myself grinning foolishly while writing. A weird joy is derived from it. Getting lost in my own imagination is truly a special feeling. This feeling is one I like to think ever writer feels, but from what I have seen on multiple forums, it is most definitely not the case. I see writers saying it feels like a second job more than anything. Reading their comments, it sounds as if they actively hate their own creations but are still writing them.
i have that feeling when i get in the groove. i lose that feeling when i try to "structure" and be "proper" about writing instead of just following the muse.
i think a lot of authors might feel that way because they write for reasons other than just wanting to write for their own enjoyment, even if they start from feeling the enjoyment.
I enjoy the 'post'-writing part, since it feels like a huge achievement. However, I don't enjoy the 'mid'-writing part, though it's a necessary process I have to go through in order to produce something.
When I first tried to write, it was a black butler fanfic. I read another bb fanfic and loved it and wanted to make something similar.
It didn't work that great.
Anyway, then I forgot about it for several years, found nu and then I found rrl and read a few fics there.
Funnily enough, it was the casual 12 chapter self-indulgent highly unprofessional dropped novels that were written on pure enthusiasm that got me interested in writing again. I read Nigotta Hitome no Lillianne and based on that I wanted to write a fic. It was more of a "Eh, might as well try" kind of thing.
Then there were other times when i felt "this idea is pretty fun. I'll try it"
Well, pure enthusiasm can only get you this far. After a while I'd get tired and put these novels aside because either I'd changed and could no longer resonate with the novels I'd tried writing or because I put the main idea down and had no clue what to do next.
The longer those novels went on, the stronger the resistance of unplanned and sometimes conflicting plot elements, lacking motivation, poor character motivations etc etc got.
Yeah... I think this is what all the whining is about usually. You make something you like at first, then you don't like it as much but the prior commitment, the time you already put, your pride and expectations of the readers kind of make you go on after you no longer like it as much.
Kinda like marriage I guess. Not that I'd ever been married.
Then I felt like I wanted to finish a novel just to prove a point to myself. It didn't have to be anything spectacular or long or anything. Just complete. That's how I ended up writing my blog. "My" blog.
Anyway, that was done. Since I didn't really put any real effort into it and basically pulled it out of my a-, ahem, witch's hat-I didn't really feel like I proved anything to myself.
So now I want to write and finish a "real" novel so I can prove a point I don't know to myself again. It's probably going to take some time.
I definitely enjoy writing. Especially when I get an interesting idea and I can imagine how readers will react to it. :)
I suppose these authors who say they hate their work afterwards is because their story isn't going in the direction they want it to and they don't like it? Maybe.
Another reason could be that maybe they have someone behind them telling them what to write. I would hate that too.
And in the end, either it's no longer fun for them, it's making a living.
These are the only three cases I can think of for them to have a reason to hate their creation.
I have a blast when I write, honestly. May sound weird, but when I get into it, I'll be fully acting out scenes. I've gotten downright giddy about it before.
It may just be my approach to my story, but I haven't gotten to the point of feeling like it's a drag. There's been chapters I found less interesting to write, sure, but at no point have I hated having to write. We'll see how it is down the road of course, but that's my two cents thus far.
That's your answer. Once you start thinking rationally and analyze your writing to get better, you start noticing all the mistakes. Seeing that your own creation is not where it should be in terms of quality makes you hate it, and strive to do better.
I sometimes giggle like a little girl when writing, especially romantic scenes or comedic back and forths between characters. However, the charm usually wears off after the second or third read through and I end up hating it for a few weeks until I come back to it and get caught off-guard by an interesting sentence or idea that I forgot I wrote.
It's a love/hate relationship. Right now I'm in the 'hate' stage. I do better with short horror stories but am trying a longer adventure/fantasy and struggling with the minutiae, the things that happen between the big scenes.
I don’t enjoy it in a giggling sort of way that I would daydreaming, I enjoy it in a “look I made something that mattered” and “I’m proud of myself, I did a good job” sort of way
It's complicated. On one hand, when someone writes just for the sake of it, then of course it'll be enjoyable. Otherwise they wouldn't be doing that in the first place.
There are many people who write to make a living, or for other various reasons that aren't related directly to writing, for them writing is the means to something, not a goal in itself. That makes it very easy to forget why write at all, and go into a state of doing something because they've been doing something, kind of continuing only because they don't want to stop or don't know what else to do.
Many people find ways to overcome that, of course, but still. It's a trap that's very easy to fall into that sucks all fun out of writing. I haven't had experiences this bad myself, but I got a bit too close for comfort some time ago.
My oldest story I started building up when I was 7 years old. The lore is so elaborate, there's history within history. Parts of the lore that I discarded and replaced a decade ago have been so thorough, they acted as a base for two of my current stories here on SH. Yet I never wrote a story until 10 years ago, when I randomly wrote a chapter and posted it online the same day, just to see what happens. The reason?
I was too lazy to ever write any of my ideas down. I didn't have to, for myself, because the story is already in my head and amuses me. But once I started writing and people started taking interest in my stories, I wished for them to entertain others as well. That made me happy. It didn't have to be grand, just a few hours of notable fun.
Does that mean, I'm no longer lazy? No, I just get over it. As hyped as I am to write my stories down, once I actually sit there and should be writing, everything else is more interesting than putting in the work.
I also have scenes that make me smile, but it's usually when I correct a chapter or check for something and read over a scene later when something stupidly makes me grin (I usually just think myself very funny).
So yeah, it's not that I hate it, but writing takes a lot of energy out of you still. That doesn't mean you don't like writing, but especially if you don't have much time to bank on, it can get extremely tiring.
I enjoy it a lot when I write. I like being immersed in a world I’ve created. Sometimes I’d have an outline or goal for a chapter and it’ll have a detour. I found that fun. There are also days when I doubt myself a lot and wiring gets so painful though.
That's your answer. Once you start thinking rationally and analyze your writing to get better, you start noticing all the mistakes. Seeing that your own creation is not where it should be in terms of quality makes you hate it, and strive to do better.
The actual writing and imagining things is fun, and I still enjoy doing that. The reflection of my writing makes me hate the writing. The story could be good or even great, but the sentences can always be improved. Or maybe this dialogue was too long.
It is the microscope that makes me hate my writing. It's like when people don't realize there is bacteria, until they use a microscope. Then those people become germaphobes.
I often find myself grinning foolishly while writing. A weird joy is derived from it. Getting lost in my own imagination is truly a special feeling. This feeling is one I like to think every writer feels, but from what I have seen on multiple forums, it is most definitely not the case. I see writers saying it feels like a second job more than anything. Reading their comments, it sounds as if they actively hate their own creations but are still writing them.
I am a cloud of pure spite and eyes. I hate everyone and everything, well, as much as an eldritch horror can "feel". Consider yourself lucky I can muster enough emotion to hate you because to hate you and your disgusting, abnormal, unholy BONES must mean I at least care enough to loathe your very existence.
Your joy is abnormal.
You clearly are biologically defective. You must seek out immediate medical attention and receive medication. I do not care what kind, as long as it is enough to stop your joy from disturbing the tranquil stillness that is my reality. You are a single ripple upon a vast unknowable pond and I wish you to stop.
Here is a quote from my guide on how to be a writer:
How to self-motivate:
Tell yourself, "NO ONE LOVES YOU! YOU ARE A WASTE OF SKIN! YOU ARE ONLY WORTH SOMETHING WHEN YOU DO SOMETHING! IF YOU AREN'T DOING SOMETHING, WHAT GOOD ARE YOU? EVERY MOMENT YOU WASTE NOT DOING SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE, A BABY KITTEN DIES! IF YOU ONLY TRIED HARDER, THERE WOULD BE LESS DEAD LOVED ONES IN YOUR LIFE! EVERYONE YOU EVER LOVED THAT DIED IS YOUR FAULT BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T WORK HARD ENOUGH!"
Stop being so smug and enjoying yourself. If it isn't work, it isn't worth it. Suffering is the true motivation in this world.
LOVE?
HAH!
Love encourages people to become lumps of immobile flesh that remain in one place cooing with enjoyment just because of the presence of another. Love does not motivate. The DESIRE for love motivates.
If you are about to lose your love, you feel fear and act.
If someone harms your love, you feel hate and act.
If another loves your love, you feel envy and act.
If your love teases you, you feel lust and act.
Love, joy, happiness, all these POSITIVE EMOTIONS... they do not encourage you. It is the threat of the removal or loss of whatever is positive in your life that pushes you forward.
You typed it yourself. You feel joy WHILE WRITING. So you write because to stop causes you loss. You are not enjoying yourself. You are merely trying to put off the long dark night of the soul that comes for us all.
The writers who see it as a job are wrong as well. They should see it as penance for daring to exist in a world where I also exist. They should be writing amusing things for my enjoyment, only to fail because nothing amuses me. This Sisyphean task is the lot in life for all of you creatures.
DANCE! DANCE FOR MY AMUSEMENT! YOUR SUFFERING SUSTAINS ME!
...
But other than that, it's different for everyone, so I suggest you learn to enjoy this state of mind until you eventually become bitter, burned out, and disillusioned by the cruel nature of life itself.
I would like to point out YOU asked what I THOUGHT about this. It's not my fault you wanted to know what I think. Remarkably toxic place, my brain.
