Writing Critique my main protagonists

[EngineGear]

Daniel Estimar (The Leader/Heart/Optimist): Prince of Caelania, Grandson of King-Emperor Raymond Estimar. Has dreams to be an adventurer, just like his grandmother. Trained for most of his life with his older brother and sister, he got accepted into Grand Ridge Academy one year early thanks to the headmistress, Elvira Dominguez.

Cairo Hawkins (The Realist Lancer): The quiet and melancholic one. Has powerful pyrokinetic powers but is very reluctant to use them at full power out of fear of hurting someone close to him.

Yolanda Arias (The Apathetic Big Gal): A star athlete with a heart of gold. She only got into Grand Ridge through a lottery drawing. She’s lonely at being on top and wants to make meaningful relationships. She hopes by attending Grand Ridge, she can make actual friends.

Mika Valkrana (The Cynical Chick): A half-elf who faced systemic discrimination for most of her life. Bullied by both humans and elves, she faced an identity crisis and now seeks to find her own identity. She’s a bit of a tsundere but is secretly a softie. (Mika and Cairo may have a thing going on since she got stuck in a VR game and surviving together)

Ryunosuke Kawasaki (The Conflicted Smart Guy): The youngest son of a cold-hearted business tycoon. Got accepted into Grand Ridge Academy through special recommendation. He took the chance and left for Grand Ridge, tired of trying to live up to his father’s high expectations. His motivations are indecisive due to his low self-esteem.

 

[Anon_Y_Mousse]

From what I understand, Mika and Cairo got isekai'd? That explains why Cairo would be reluctant to hurt people, with earthen morals and all. This academy is very weird with their enrollment though, I mean getting accepted one year earlier is fine, but there has to be a damn good explanation for the lottery. Yolanda seems set up to be a romantic interest, also I think you mean empathetic cause apathetic is a lack of emotion. Can't say much about Daniel and Ryunosuke, their backgrounds are pretty basic for academy novels.

 

[Jemini]

Not even going to try it, haven't even read over your little blurbs. If you want a critique of your protagonists, this method here is worthless. If you know enough about your protagonists to ACTUALLY post up something useful enough for us to critique in such a short blurb, then you know enough about them to fix any problems they may have yourself.

The only way this works is if we read your actual story, so, yeah... ask for something like that instead I guess.

 

[EngineGear]

Yolanda seems set up to be a romantic interest, also I think you mean empathetic cause apathetic is a lack of emotion.

Yolanda's pretty lazy at first glance. When she puts in the work, though, she puts in the work.

The only way this works is if we read your actual story, so, yeah... ask for something like that instead I guess.

Still working on the first three chapters.

 

[RepresentingCaution]

Mika Valkrana (The Cynical Chick): A half-elf who faced systemic discrimination for most of her life. Bullied by both humans and elves, she faced an identity crisis and now seeks to find her own identity. She’s a bit of a tsundere but is secretly a softie. (Mika and Cairo may have a thing going on since she got stuck in a VR game and surviving together)

She's the odd one out. We get the idea that everyone else was accepted to the academy for some reason or other, but why did the academy take her? What are her skills?

 

[SakeVision]

now do the same but use only two words and reduce them to "muh"
example

Yolanda Arias: muh talent

 

[EngineGear]

now do the same but use only two words and reduce them to "muh"
example

Yolanda Arias: muh talent

Daniel Estimar: muh adventure

Cairo Hawkins: muh chill

Yolanda Arias: muh lazy

Mika Valkrana: muh tsundere

Ryunosuke Kawasaki: muh shy