Can I please get feedback on my first chapter?

[SSPy]

I been working too long on the first chapter to the point the words litterally blur and It would really help me seeing some outside perpective. Thank you.

Abyssal Descent [WIP]

Synopsis: The biggest and deadliest dungeon to ever exist, also known as The Abyss, is the source of overwhelming wealth and fame for any adventurer who survives delving into its depths. Sonnet has a connection with The Abyss, yet she has avoided it since her birth, she knew that the moment sh...

docs.google.com

 

[Nolff]

I don't see much ugly stuff other than the duplicated sentences near the beginning.

 

[CharlesEBrown]

A lot of tiny quibbles but overall, very nicely set up.

 

[SSPy]

A lot of tiny quibbles but overall, very nicely set up.

Thanks a lot for the corrections, it's very helpful

I don't see much ugly stuff other than the duplicated sentences near the beginning.

Good to know, thank you