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Got some feedback on a scene and need to know which version flows better, is the least confusing, and captures the "best" vibe. https://ellipsus.com/read/3LtV2orNpctCNiysh8Itv3/chap-47-diff Thanks in advance ! (All feedback is welcome)

Heya ! Thought my ongoing story needed some spice so I ended up writing this one action scene. Would appreciate to know what you guys think about it. (shounen is the bane of my existence) :blob_catflip: There may be some out-of-context exposition, but just ignore it haha...

Helloz everypeeps ! I'm publishing my first chapter of my Otome Isekai that I worked on instead of studying. This novel was inspired by korean manwha/webnovels such as: I'm a Villainess, Can I die? A Painting of the Villainess as a Young Lady Resetting Lady How to Win My Husband Over Roxanne...