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Not at all. Words are only powerful when you give them power. My brother and I call each other retarded all of the time. The moment you give the words power over you to make you angry, then you are losing a war. There is no pride that comes with saying the word, it's just something to call other people when you feel they're being dumb.

This is actually true. There was a debate team that made it all the way to nationals by twisting every issue they were debating on about race. The opposing team argued the logical fallacy of using race to debunk a well thought out argument with a simple one. But the people who decided who would win the debate still awarded the victory to the team turning everything into race.

I much prefer someone directly calling me retarded than if they do it in a roundabout way and beat around the bush. People that are scared of this word will also tell me that my thoughts are infantile or some other form to academically call me a retard. I'd much rather talk to someone who doesn't do this pussyfooting around a word and gets to the meat of it.

I prefer calling you acoustic.

In basic training, being called retard was a rite of passage.

Its not that im "scared" of the word, its that I have literal ptsd/trauma symptoms from all the times that word was used to abuse or dehumanize me without my consent, used to deny me basic human accommodations, a word used to justify chaining autistic kids up to radiators in institutions in the 90s, a fate I barely escaped myself. A word still used to perpetuate harm.

I dont care if you think its a rite of passage or a right at all. you cannot “reclaim” the r slur. there’s no way to reclaim that nasty word because you literally can’t use it in a way that isn’t derogatory. i’m so tired of people saying this stupid shit like why is it hard for you to just not use it at all???

Right, but you can say stupid when that word was used to do the same thing as well. Living in the world is not about trying to walk on egg shells because someone might be traumatized from a word. Imagine if I was traumatized from being called stupid all of my life. People pop fireworks on the 4th of July even though there are PTSD veterans.

I have plenty of trauma and don't wear it everywhere I go like it's some badge, nor do I expect people to placate me everywhere. You can't go through life expecting the world to bend around your traumas.

Personally, I don't like insulting people.
But it won't stop me from thinking it.
Or recommending someone be institutionalized.

Okay but like, is it really that hard not to say a word with heavy historical and ableist baggage? Like, what's so important that you cant find another term? Im genuinely confused why people dont want to stop using a term that can only hurt others? Why cant I use my trauma to advocate to avoid causing more trauma?

I mean that sincerely, what's so important about the R Slur that not being allowed to use it is the end of the world? Can't we be more creative than that? Its cheap and takes shots at disabled people like myself, who, for the most part, are just struggling to live each day. Nobody HAS to propagate harmful language.

Is respecting my personal space (as you *are* on MY page after all) too big of an ask? Is it too much to ask that we find less creatively bankrupt ways to insult others WITHOUT attacking a trait they have no control over?

Banning one word won't fix the issue. "Ableist" will continue acting like one and simply use another word to hurt other people. Same with any other slur.

When you try to stop people using the word, you're giving it more power over you. It's not like I go out of my way to say it. I'm autistic and have no problem with the word. Yeah, words can hurt, but intentions behind words is what you have to look at. If you can call something or someone stupid with the same intent that I use the other word, what's the difference?

It's like how gay became an escape for homosexual, but now some people are offended by gay and prefer homosexual.

They were never happy at all.
The underlying issue is still there.

And im autistic and im not comfortable with the word, so why does your desire to say the word override my desire to not have to hear the word? Why does what one autistic person want apply to the whole group?

Like, why do you have to say the word so bad in ways that only are used as insults? Thats not reclaiming the word, thats just punching down.

Alright honest question here. I am learning to be an auto mechanic, and the word retard is an actual mechanical term used basically to mean have something happen earlier. If i say, "The engine hasnt retarded timing enough", have i said a slur?