How to write a certain scene?

[RepresentingWrath]

I'm not sure I should ask this here or in other subforum, but whatever. Before I begin, I want to mention another thing. I don't need an answer immediately. Although I do plan to include such scenes in the future, it won't happen soon. So this is more of a discussion spurred by my curiosity.

With this out of the way, the scene itself. How to write an eating\dining scene that will make a reader disgusted without disgusting parts. What I mean by this, how to disgust a reader with eating scene, without using\including disgusting food(for example, maggot-infested food, or poop) or physically disgusting, repulsive characters? Basically, how to write a Denethor eating scene from LotR movie? I understand that you should probably show contrast, and focus on the personality of a character who should disgust while eating. Yet the technicalities, how exacty I should do it eludes me. So, if you can add a small example to your answer, it would be great.

 

[Deleted member 84247]

You can write about their facial expressions. Expressions can tell a ton about what a character is feeling. Not just expressions, their actions can paint the picture clearly.

Example: Sailus sat down at the dining table, the food was laid out immaculately. The steak was tender, all of the fat seared off. His knife was easily able to cut into the meat. He elegantly raised the food to his mouth. Taking a bite out of the cut, he frowned. He crinkled his nose as he slammed his fork on the table. "Who is the chef that made this?"

I don't know if this is a good example, but I hope it helps.

 

[RepresentingWrath]

You can write about their facial expressions. Expressions can tell a ton about what a character is feeling. Not just expressions, their actions can paint the picture clearly.

Example: Sailus sat down at the dining table, the food was laid out immaculately. The steak was tender, all of the fat seared off. His knife was easily able to cut into the meat. He elegantly raised the food to his mouth. Taking a bite out of the cut, he frowned. He crinkled his nose as he slammed his fork on the table. "Who is the chef that made this?"

I don't know if this is a good example, but I hope it helps.

The example isn't fitting I think, but your advice is good.

 

[ThrillingHuman]

if the people are disgusting, then the scene will be disgusting too. Make them chew loudly, yell for the waiter, drop food on their clothes, etc.

If the people are alright, but the food is awful, make them take a bite, cringe, stop chewing and spit it out. Make them look at the food with disgust as it drips from the fork in chunks.

 

[HellerFeed]

You can just describe the character's bad table manners in detail.
For eg:
-Chewing food loudly
-Talking while eating food and spitting crumbs
-Spilling food on table and clothes
-Describe Greasy yucky hands that he uses to soil all the cutlery around
-Maybe using the same indirect kiss- spoon to even soil the main dish.
-Eating only half of the food- Like eating pizza but leftover sides,
-Just touching everything with greasy hands
-Leftover food/ wasting food

 

[ManwX]

You could use their behaviours. Like a very repulsive habit that the main character notices.

 

[ACertainPassingUser]

Why the POV's character feel disgusted in first place ?

Is is due to the stronger smell of bad food oil ? A hint of Bad chemical Preservatives ? Milk smell that's too similar to the recent milk truck crash accident ? A perfume smell that got mixed up with juice smell, which smell like rotting fruit ? Durian

 

[RepresentingWrath]

Why the POV's character feel disgusted in first place ?

how to disgust a reader with eating scene

 

[ThrillingHuman]

how to disgust a reader with eating scene

honestly, just put one there for no good reason. And make it a Japanese food scene, in another world for good measure. And make everybody love the food out of nowhere - just to really nail it down.

At the very least you will disgust me.

And since only my opinion matters, that's good enough.

 

[Whitephantom]

What you could do is envision a 2-5yr old eating at the table, since they know no better they would smear food around there area, they would have food around there face, hair even there body. They would take bad table manners to the upmost limits basically lmao. Smacking loudly in ur ears, babbling with chewed food in there mouths and chunks flying on ur face with salvia on it, food simply dripping out of there mouths as they eat, stuffing there face with food while talking, having the whole area be smothered in chewed food, spit or even puke in some cases.

Imagine you’re at a dining table right, this kid is across from you and you’re eating meatloaf, a nice meatloaf. This kid across from you then stuffs his face with beans and wouldn’t you know it he throws up black puke, I hope I ruined peoples day

 

[RepresentingWrath]

Imagine you’re at a dining table right, this kid is across from you and you’re eating meatloaf, a nice meatloaf. This kid across from you then stuffs his face with beans and wouldn’t you know it he throws up black puke, I hope I ruined peoples day

This is obviously disgusting, but it's not what I'm looking for. The point is to write a normal meal, but make it disgusting. The person's table manners can be bad, but not THAT bad, since it's the easy way to make readers disgusted and I don't need anyone's advice to write it.

 

[Lodur]

The example for you from classics.

But I have had my revenge at last. I do not believe that I am a vindictive man, but when the immortal gods take a hand in the matter it is pardonable to observe the result with complacency. Today she weighs twenty-one stone.

(It's easy to find Russian translation online, I've read this story translated first, still found it a pearl).

Well... It's hard to predict, what you will feel as a reader... maybe not disgust per se, but MC of the story was undoubtedly disgusted.

 

[RepresentingWrath]

The example for you from classics.

But I have had my revenge at last. I do not believe that I am a vindictive man, but when the immortal gods take a hand in the matter it is pardonable to observe the result with complacency. Today she weighs twenty-one stone.

(It's easy to find Russian translation online, I've read this story translated first, still found it a pearl).

Well... It's hard to predict, what you will feel as a reader... maybe not disgust per se, but MC of the story was undoubtedly disgusted.

The point is to make a reader disgusted, since I might use a third-person POV when writing such scene. As for your example, thank you, but it's not what I'm looking for.

 

[KrakenRiderEmma]

Videotape yourself eating food, with the camera close to your mouth, and recording audio. Play it back on a much larger screen, with the audio turned up.

This will reveal the truth that the Denethor scene is also about: eating is a disgusting biological process. Hard mallets of bone are grinding and pulverizing soft bits of flesh and vegetable matter, juices are spilling out, some of it crunches or pops, it's going in the mouth but also a little on the chin. A flap of pink flesh probes around inside that moist cavern, searching for and rubbing off bits and pieces of debris -- is that a tongue? How did you never realize that a tongue, every tongue, is like a tentacle attached to the floor of a mouth. You are used to ignoring eating as utterly commonplace, but once you start staring, it's impossible to look away, and the real horror comes out. The everyday horror.

 

[RepresentingWrath]

Videotape yourself eating food, with the camera close to your mouth, and recording audio. Play it back on a much larger screen, with the audio turned up.

This will reveal the truth that the Denethor scene is also about: eating is a disgusting biological process. Hard mallets of bone are grinding and pulverizing soft bits of flesh and vegetable matter, juices are spilling out, some of it crunches or pops, it's going in the mouth but also a little on the chin. You are used to ignoring it, but once you start staring, it's impossible to look away, and the real horror comes out. The everyday horror.

Yes. If you didn't understand(I know my English isn't the best), how do you put it on paper? That's the point of this thread. How to write this.

 

[NotaNuffian]

Well, what would make an onlooker disgusted when looking at someone eating?

Since your reader is seeing with words, the only thing that the author can do is describe the acts that make the onlooker disgusted.

And since you set the limit to no disgusting food and no disgusting character, you can choose to make the action of said person disgusting?

For example, and this is a bad one.

"You would let them off if... if I eat this?" The unkempt man held up a packet of rat poison as his voice cracked from questioning the gentleman eating a steak.

"Why yes," his knife cleanly sawed through the medium rare, bits of blood oozed as he forked it for a bite, "would I lie to you, now that you are here?"

"... okay." There isn't much choice for Tim in the first place, his children are the only thing left after Mary's death. "I'll do it." He shoved the packet into his mouth, so swiftly as though terrified of haveing second thoughts.

The poison worked well. Within minutes the unkempt man was convulsing with foams out of his mouth. His cloudy eyes refocused upon staring at the sky and as though finding peace, he let out his last gasp as he exits the world of the living.

The dinner was fantastic for Jerry as he wiped the edges of his mouth clean with a napkin. With a sip of the red wine whilst the dead rat getting dragged off, he issued his promise.

"Kill them."

 

[TheKillingAlice]

If it's not about behaviour or looks of the people in the scene, or the food itself, context truly matters.
Imagine a scene in which the new butler is serving his posh, good looking, noble new master.
(I haven't had a scene like that and didn't write something of the sort in a while, also, I'm technically still at work and divide my attention, but I still hope it gets my point across, even if it's a bit badly written.)


I walked into the room, dense with heat coming from the stove and oven. It was a quarter two five, dinner would be served in minutes.
As I sat down to wait for the kitchen staff to prepare the plates his grace would be eating from, to catch a rare break, I check the back door with a sideways glance.
Wincing could be heard, a pitiful wailing sound, sometimes very quite, and sometimes very loud.
"What's that noise?" I ask, making the chef roll his eyes.
"You're the new kid?"
Was it that obvious? "Can't you tell me?"
He let out an exaggerated sigh. "The master's dog." He put one last touch to the crab consommé he had carefully prepared, to not waste any of the precious ingredients.
If it was not perfect, the Count would have them throw it away. He was a picky eater, they said.
The last moments of my leisure, I got up and strolled over, opening the wooden door, to take a quick look at the creature that was still continuing to cry.
My eyes widened, stomach cramping, I had to swallow. A stench hit my unsuspecting nose, fouler than anything I have ever smelled.
Could they even call this a dog? It was mere skin and bone, rotting away from an open wound on its leg.
"What's wrong with it?" I asked, face pale.
"What are you doing over there? Get you ass out there, you lazy bum."
I couldn't dare ask again, as I was shooed out the kitchen with a cart in front of me. I felt a little weak, as the delicious smell of steak reached my nose, stirring an appetite that my body couldn't quite deal with at the moment.
As I opened the door to the dining area, walking up to the master seat at the table, I saw the beautiful Countess sitting there, smiling, next to the dignified looking Count that I was serving.
We put all the plates down, arrange them as inviting as possible and then rush to the side of the room, watching the dinner in case we were needed.
Sounds of chewing fill up the room, soft clattering of silver ware plays in the background, and the smell of the fancy food on the table just keeps on coming.

 

[laccoff_mawning]

Disgust is a feeling directed at something. What do you want your readers to be disgusted at?

 

[RepresentingWrath]

If it's not about behaviour or looks of the people in the scene, or the food itself, context truly matters.
Imagine a scene in which the new butler is serving his posh, good looking, noble new master.
(I haven't had a scene like that and didn't write something of the sort in a while, also, I'm technically still at work and divide my attention, but I still hope it gets my point across, even if it's a bit badly written.)


I walked into the room, dense with heat coming from the stove and oven. It was a quarter two five, dinner would be served in minutes.
As I sat down to wait for the kitchen staff to prepare the plates his grace would be eating from, to catch a rare break, I check the back door with a sideways glance.
Wincing could be heard, a pitiful wailing sound, sometimes very quite, and sometimes very loud.
"What's that noise?" I ask, making the chef roll his eyes.
"You're the new kid?"
Was it that obvious? "Can't you tell me?"
He let out an exaggerated sigh. "The master's dog." He put one last touch to the crab consommé he had carefully prepared, to not waste any of the precious ingredients.
If it was not perfect, the Count would have them throw it away. He was a picky eater, they said.
The last moments of my leisure, I got up and strolled over, opening the wooden door, to take a quick look at the creature that was still continuing to cry.
My eyes widened, stomach cramping, I had to swallow. A stench hit my unsuspecting nose, fouler than anything I have ever smelled.
Could they even call this a dog? It was mere skin and bone, rotting away from an open wound on its leg.
"What's wrong with it?" I asked, face pale.
"What are you doing over there? Get you ass out there, you lazy bum."
I couldn't dare ask again, as I was shooed out the kitchen with a cart in front of me. I felt a little weak, as the delicious smell of steak reached my nose, stirring an appetite that my body couldn't quite deal with at the moment.
As I opened the door to the dining area, walking up to the master seat at the table, I saw the beautiful Countess sitting there, smiling, next to the dignified looking Count that I was serving.
We put all the plates down, arrange them as inviting as possible and then rush to the side of the room, watching the dinner in case we were needed.
Sounds of chewing fill up the room, soft clattering of silver ware plays in the background, and the smell of the fancy food on the table just keeps on coming.

First of all, it is first-person POV, while I might use a third-person POV. This doesn't mean I don't appreciate you taking your time, but it's an important note to remember. I can kinda understand how to make a character disgusted. But it's not the same to make readers disgusted since I can't control readers, while characters that I write are my own. I can change them however I want. Anyway, I didn't find anything disgusting with your example, nor does it helps me.

Moreover, you used a disgusting thing, rotting away from an open wound on its leg. This is an easy way, and no offence, but I can do it myself. What I don't know how to do, is how to make a normal meal feel disgusting? Without mentioning rotten stuff, excrements, cannibalism, and other similar stuff, without making a person disgusting both appearence and personality-wise. How to write it?

 

[Rhaps]

Ooh, I like this topic. There are many ways to make a dining scene disgusting.

You can make the food simply taste bad and inhuman. Describing how it make the character suffer. @TheMonotonePuppet did a great job in this sense, you can check out her Charisma.

I'm good at making a conversation flow, so to make a scene involving dining disgusting, I use a topic that would not only make the characters uncomfortable, but also the reader. Most of my knowledge in this field stem from otome isekai, some of the darker ones are truly sickening.